Often in this life, we feel the need to reach standards other people have set for us. Or do things other people want us to do. Or be someone who someone else what’s us to be.
I’ve tried to reach to standards other people expected of me. I’ve tried to keep other people happy and do the things they want to do, instead of listening to my own intuition and prolonging the inevitable.
I’m not saying don’t be a “giver” and help other people. I’m not saying don’t do nice things for others.
What I am saying and I’ll go into this more is I’m confident that right now you’re doing one of the following…
- Doing something that you don’t like to do
- Not following your goals and dreams
- Trying to meet other people’s standards
- Trying to fit in, in certain groups
… and, this is keeping you stuck.
I know because I’ve been there.
For so long, I was doing things that I hated. Whether it was my 9-5, or doing things to keep others happy.
I was trying to fit with my social circle, even though I didn’t like the certain things they were doing.
Now, I’ve documented this quite a bit over the last 12 months. For those who do not know, I’ve not your typical young person. I don’t smoke or drink. I’m not into drugs or any environment that includes any of those three things I usually feel uncomfortable and run a mile. Especially when it comes to clubs etc.
I understand why people might like that sort of stuff… well, clubs anyway…
SO, when my circle was doing those exact things (minus the drugs) naturally I felt very isolated.
I wonder to myself how many other people can relate to this situation but do the opposite and join in, even when it goes against their intuition etc. I wonder how many, give in to the pressure and be someone that they weren’t meant to be.
In this life, pressures some in all shapes and sizes and of course, it’s a test of our mental toughness almost many other things.
Over this period of time, I started to listen to my intuition more. I believe there’s a difference between the little annoying voice in your head that keeps you back from being all that you can be and your intuition (maybe that’s a post for another day).
Because of all these pressures, sometimes, we give in and go against everything that we stand for. When this happens, we have to take responsivity and go back to truly finding out who we are.
“Be who you are, not who the world wants you to be”
I love that quote. I think it’s super powerful.
And, it’s a quote I always intend to standby.
If you were like me just a few years ago, you might not have a clue on who you are. You might be waking up every day and just going to your 9 to 5 then coming home, watching TV, trying to keep other people happy, battling with yourself and so on…
SO, how do you find out who you are?
Some say you create who you are. And, I agree. Through overcoming challenges, embracing change, developing self-awareness and identifying your goals and dreams and taking action every day you do create who you are and know more about who you are.
If you’re just getting started. All of this might be alien to you. And, I believe there was to be some sort of self-discovery process in the beginning.
I heard of these 5 pillars that can help you understand more of who you are over 12 months ago and ever since I have used them to help me move forward so if you want to explore who you are then it comes back down to…
- Your life values
- Your core beliefs
- Your mission
- Your vision
- Your purpose
The thing I’ve found, which is why more and more young people are probably going through mental health challenges just like I did I might add is, yes because of the pressures. And, also because they have NO IDEA on who they are of their purpose in the world.
This might be controversial, I’m going to say it anyway…
It’s no huge surprise to me because 99.9% of us (I’m still a young person – ha-ha) ignore the self-discovery process.
In fact, most of humanity ignores the self-discovery process and are not consciously aware of their life values, beliefs, mission, vision or purpose.
Hence most of us become part of someone else’s plan.
So, if you really want to be who you are and not who the world wants you to be, then stop ignoring the self-discovery process and start the journey of finding out your life values, core beliefs (and limiting beliefs, the beliefs that hold you back), your mission, vision, and purpose.
I have an idea of what you’re thinking…
The thing is I believe there’s no right way or no wrong way.
There’s just the art of starting.
Here are a few ideas though…
– Start reading educational books
– Start watching educational videos
– Start listening to material that expands your mindset. Podcasts etc.…
– Take a course in goal setting or something you’re passionate about
– Start a journal and reflect every morning and evening
– Surround yourself with like-minded people
All of these suggestions are things that I have done or still do.
Literally, I started reading education books, then watched videos instead of a program on TV I wasn’t really interested in, then got into podcasts, took courses and implemented what I learned. I started a journal, hire a coach and surround myself with like-minded people…
And, I actually created a personal growth online community called Grow2Gether because I saw how important surrounding yourself with the right people was.
What are you going to do to get started?
You can either, ignore this blog post and go back and do whatever you were doing beforehand or you could take some small steps forward…
You could go onto Amazon and buy an educational book I recommend from the recommend tools page on my site…
You could go on YouTube and search “Gary Vee videos” or “Tony Robbins” or “Impact Theory with Tom Belyeu” and watch and learn…
You could type into Apple Podcasts… “The Secret to Success Podcast” or “The School of Greatness with Lewis Howes”…
You could find a course online that interests you and take it…
You could buy a journal on Amazon and start journaling…
You could download Calm (a meditation app on the app store) and start to learn how to be more present…
You could join the Grow2Gether Online Community and start networking and connecting with like-minded people from all over the globe that will help and support you every step on the way throughout your journey…
At the end of the day, the choice is yours…
You could do something or you could do nothing.
What choice are you going to make?